Friday, March 29, 2019

29.3.2019

This blog posts is about my relationship to orgasms, from two very different viewpoints. A few days ago there was a question on a kinky Facebook group whether there's fetish for orgasm. To be exact, the question was about one's partner's or sub's orgasm, for example in D/s relationship, fantasizing about making one's sub to pass out, being obsessed about it and so on.

Well, I have a huge, huge fetish for my partner's orgasm, and for female orgasm in general. One could even claim it's not quite healthy anymore, but then again, what fetish is?

As you know, I am an assigned submissive male, but I have always have what I call a pleasing fetish, doing whatever my partner likes, forgetting my own physical pleasure but getting huge emotional pleasure in return. And that pleasing often includes female orgasm.

In most of my relationships there has been elements of BDSM but none of my partners have been purely dominant. When they have noticed how much I love to make them cum other ways than using my male-ish genitals they have been more than willing to let me.

In my head that has been an act of submission, even if the person I am making to cum is quite under my control as it happens. Also, since the act isn't a stepping stone to something else, but all there is for me, I like to get most out of it.

Meaning, when I go down on a woman I stay there until she gestures me to stop. There have been times they have lost their ability speak momentarily, after orgasming so much. When that happens I feel extremely pleased, knowing I have done a good job.

When I make my partner cum I want it to be an act of worship, plain and simple, and I wouldn't even want to soil it with my own physical pleasure. Like I said, maybe not totally healthy, but I cannot help it. Woman orgasming is my opinion the most beautiful sight in the world.


A few days earlier there had been another question in the very same group. This time the question was about "mind fuck". Is that your kink? What do you like about doing it or recieving it? And so on. Well, I have always felt mind fuck it's so much more erotic than anything you can do with or to your body. 

Let's take an example. As you all know I have a huge orgasm denial fetish. However, I still remember the time when the idea of not being able to cum daily was unthinkable, and by the third day I was usually climbing on walls.

Those days I had a young and pretty girlfriend, who had a quirky personality, and a dominant streak she knew I liked. We were unable to see each other daily, so we spent most of our time on chat.

Once the discussion between us led us to cum bans and she decided it would be fun to forbid cumming for me until we saw each other again. 

Then she went through every day I wasn't allowed to cum, each as a separate chat message:

"You're not allowed to cum today." 

"You're not allowed to cum tomorrow." 

"You're not allowed to cum the day after." 

"And you're not allowed to cum the four days following that."

Then she told she would be cumming a lot during that time, and to just make it more tormenting for me she would let me know every time she had one. And that she would have one right away.

At that point I was so horny, my heart was racing, and my hands were literally shaking.

Does that qualify a mind fuck?