As most of you know I have kept a diary of my orgasms or lack of them, dating all the way to 2012. You all also know I'm heavily into chastity and have had incredibly long chastity periods in the past.
I have been involved the past few months in a project that's taken a lot of my time and energy. Because of it I have had to "give in" to the needs of my body, and to start cumming once in 5 to 6 days, to get my mind off sex and to be able to concentrate.
The project is now over, and a couple of days I asked a Domme I know what I should do now. Should I start denying myself properly again, or give in to my body whenever it so wishes?
The problem is that since I'm single there isn't anyone controlling my orgasms. I have therefore felt extremely bad for having the orgasms I've had, since I feel I shouldn't be the one who decides whether I cum or not. After being in cum bans of varying length since 2013, the act of cumming without permission just feels... wrong.
My friend thought the question over and a minute said that since I have a habit of brooding and periods of melancholy she prescribed an orgasm a day for me...
...for the next eight weeks.
"We will see how you feel after that", she added.
I am well aware she could have given me an equally long chastity period as well, which I would have accepted gladly. But that's the beauty of giving over the control of your sexual functions to someone else.
The picture below is a chart of all my orgasms I've had this year. The red dots indicate ban days, the green ones cum days, the black dots ruined orgasms and the magenta ones the beginning of my mandatory cumming routine.
As you can see from the chart I really haven't cummed that much this year, even though it feels to me I have done so an awfully lot. In fact I have only begun to realize what sort a commitment following my Domme friend's prescription actually is.
After all, it's been almost four years since I've last had the possibility to cum that often, and even before I started chastity play there was days I just didn't feel like masturbating. Never in my life I've had an obligation to masturbate daily.
At least I haven't cummed nearly as often I am now supposed to. No matter whether I have time or energy for it, no matter if a want to cum. No matter where I am. A cum a day, period. By the time we get to the end of the eight week period it will be fall already.
Like I said, this will be a challenge for me, and I sincerely hope I can keep up with the new routine. At the same time I am extremely happy, not because I get to cum but because it is not me who is control of my orgasms. Since that is the way it's supposed to be, after all.
Already there has been more than one occasions when I wouldn't have even liked to masturbate, but done so anyway, because I have to. To feel your own hand pulling on your limp clit, and knowing it has nothing to do with whether I want it or not, is extremely arousing. It also makes one to feel wonderfully used.