13.10.2019

A couple of days ago there was a post on Bdsmlr which equated long term chastity with so called Stockholm syndrome. That is, the longer one stays in chastity the more he starts to fear freedom.

That is an interesting way to look at it, but I must agree. It does work like that, at least with it does with me, even though I do my chastity alone.

I have on many occasions ended up explaining the mechanics behind prolonged chastity to baffled people on-line. I have told them the longer you deny yourself, the more the thought of starting to cum normally stats to feel strange and unnatural, even frightening.

Or, as a real life female friend who I have confided to about my weird fetish once said, as I pondered whether I will stop my chastity after some big milestone: "I think you will go on. Continuing is the safe thing to do, and you have always wanted to play it safe. I know you too well."

What I find interesting, as well as humorous and sad, is the fact that almost every time people also bring up the subject of intercourse: "Soon you will start fear sex and intercourse as well." In a way that is understandable, for most normal people that is what sex is. 

I, however, find that presumption somewhat disturbing. The thing is, as far as penetration goes, it is something I have never actually understood. This is due to the fact I started losing the ability to become erect in my thirties, way before I my first girlfriend finally managed to take my cherry.

Many times fellow subs have asked me on-line: "But don't you miss fucking?" I usually reply: "Do you miss being on Mars?" How could I miss something I have never had?

I have had normal penetrative sex a few times in my life, but I have to admit I've never felt it's something I should be doing. It's what grown-ups and real men and women do. So, in other words, I have been afraid of intercourse and sex all my life.

I feel the most I could hope for, sexually speaking, would be to find a woman who would allow me to pleasure her orally whenever she so wishes, and if she feels I have earned it, to masturbate or edge while she observes. Whether I would be allowed to actually cum would be totally up to her.

I am, however, very bad at "selling myself" to the fairer gender. I am not that bad to look at, but I feel I don't have a right to approach women. After all, I have so little to offer, and my sexual tastes are too peculiar. I am painfully aware I am inadequate sexually, and unable to satisfy women, so why even try?

The original thread on Bdsmlr can be found here.