16.5.2017

Morning horniness is a curious thing. No amount of erotic stimulation can compete with the erotic arousal you have when you wake up, hard or semi hard. When you're in that sweet semi-conscious state unsure what's true and what's not.

As you all know, I try very hard not to lose my libido even though I'm in cum ban. Therefore I try to masturbate as much as I can during the daytime. I take great pride doing it, since it is, after all what I do best, and the times I pull my limp dick are the ones I truly feel being alive.

I have lately noticed that weather seems to have an effect on my masturbation. At the moment we're having a chilly spring, and it has even snowed several times during this April. Some weeks ago there were warm spring days, and my edging immediately doubled. As soon as the cloudy and chilly weather returned, it diminished drastically.

But like I said, I have done it as much as humanly possible, and it seems I have indeed been succesful keeping my libido alive. Several nights in a row I have had erotic dreams, and I have woken up extremely horny.

I would gladly tell you about my dreams, if I had any idea what takes place in them. My dreams are generally very hazy jumble of things, and unfortunately that applies to the erotic ones as well. As I wake up all I can remember is flash images, without any kind of idea who I had been, and what I had been doing with whom in the dream.

In any case, couple of mornings now I have been turned on enough to hump my cover in my semi-conscious state. I know that doesn't sound much, but they have been the most erotic experiences I've had in ages. Usually at that point I don't have an erection anymore, only this... puffed feeling on my penis. I sleep nude to encourage my morning erection and erotic dreams, so usually there's nothing between my penis and the quilt I am grabbing on.

What took place this morning a mere moments ago, must be the most arousing series of events so far. During the past couple of mornings I haven't dared to hump the quilt very long, since I seem to have this alarm in my head, that makes me stop what I am doing before it starts to feel too good, often way in advance. Preventing myself from cumming, no matter the circumstances, seems to have become a second nature for me.

This morning, however, I took a more decisive approach, and continued humping longer than previously. With due fairness, I have to say my movements, or "thrusts", weren't that big, and I think someone looking at me wouldn't necessarily have even noticed them. To me, however, it felt almost as if I had been fucking something.

First I made a series of fives, then ten, and finally twenty-five. At that point I had to stop because I felt I was getting too close to orgasm. I just stayed there, horny as hell, listened the sound of my heart that was beating like hell, and enjoyed the aching, desperate throbbing in my testicles. They wanted so bad to get all that sperm out. I didn't remember when they had been that alive.

As soon as I dared, I continued and did another twenty-five, then fifty. At that point, having done a full hundred, I had stop for a while. I was so turned on, my aching balls were begging for a release and it all seemed... so wonderfully humiliating.

I considered my options. I started to become more and more awake, and I was able to think more coherently now. I even considered the possibility of letting myself to cum, or at least trying to. To feel the approaching orgasm, and letting it engulf and wash over me. I would actually feel sperm ooze out of my flaccid penis. Most likely there wouldn't be more than a few drops, and by anyone else's standards it would be called a ruined orgasm, but it would feel so, so good for. me.

After all, I had already been...what, over seventy days since my last orgasm. Wouldn't there be time for another one, at some point? And I would be doing it by humping a quilt, with my flaccid penis, for crying out loud. What a humiliating story that would make to tell on my blog. Since I knew I would have to describe this experience there, with every little humiliating detail.

But on the other hand, I knew how much better story it would make, if I could describe all this, and not having to end it by telling how I let myself to cum. To be able to tell you I didn't cum, even though I wanted it desperately. Also, I knew, if I let myself cum it would mean I would have to start counting from zero again, without even having to reach triple digits. Did I really want that? Was I ready for it?

At some point, as I was thinking all of this I had continued humping the quilt in series of twenty-fives and fifties. I even considered how humiliating story it would make if I actually decided I would let myself cum, but ultimately were unable to do so, after all? Somewhere around 300 I lost count, but continued humping the quilt. All in all I think I got somewhere between 500 and 600, before the waking world finally dragged me from my sweet slumber.

As soon as I had gotten up I turned my computer on, sat down still naked and started writing. I wanted to get it all down, when I was still fresh in my memory. Naturally I have been pulling my limp penis the whole time, and I feel drops of sweat rolling down on my naked body. All I can think of what somebody would think if he or she saw me now.

However, even though this is highly enjoyable, and I seem unable to stop, it's not even close to what I experienced earlier...